i feel like i am neglecting my blog..

Gosh, it has been busy around here!

First, Kaleb is now 19 months. What the heck?! Seriously. Didn't I JUST do the 18 month post? And now I am thinking about his birthday party. I know, it's November. And that's in March. But I like making plans dag-nabit! I am excited for the idea that I have in my head so I hope that it all works out as planned. I also am working on Kaleb's big boy room. I am having fun looking for things, and just taking my time because I have an idea, and I want it to come out just right. I have bought two things, and have lots more to buy. I figure it will be done by the end of the year....hopefully.

Halloween was a blast. Okay, but can I just say...trick-or-treating is exhausting! I don't know why it made me so damn tired...but I felt like it was 10 at night when we were done, and it was only 7:30! What the heck?! Kaleb had a lot of fun though..but it was so very bittersweet...more on that later. So Kaleb officially is addicted to candy. A.D.D.I.C.T.E.D.!! He can even say candy, so that makes it even worse! His trick-or-treat bag fell out of another bag yesterday, and he grabs the bag, and tells me, "CANDY! CANDY!" For holy sakes, it was 10am! I found some fruit snacks and emptied them into the bag, and that tricked him...that time. It's really cute..but it is making my O.C.D. go into panic mode! Can you brush a toddler's teeth too much?

Now, on to why it was bittersweet..It was awesome being there, experiencing that as a mother. But as we walked up to the first house, I was there, holding Kaleb's hand, and all I could think about is, Roland shouldn't be missing this. I let go of the thought for the rest of the night. Roland got home and I tried not to show him that I was sad that he wasn't there, but lets face it, I'm a bad liar. Then it hit me. Thanksgiving is on a Thursday. Christmas Eve, a Thursday. Christmas Day, a Friday. Roland's days off are Tuesdays and Wednesdays. No, that doesn't change on holidays, birthdays, or anything else I may want him to be home for. The Juvenile Campus doesn't close..so therefore, Roland works. I guess last year it didn't bother me so much. Kaleb was younger, and didn't really know what was going on. Now it's just hard. Especially since every single day Kaleb is asking for Roland anyways, but on holidays, it makes it that much harder. I figure I will host Thanksgiving and Christmas this year. I am doing that in case Roland ends up working a double shift on either/both holidays. That's the planner/O.C.D. in me again. I want to have a plan, and know that it isn't going to change. Another thing really bothering me about all of this? Santa has to come to our house on either the 23rd of December or Christmas Eve. Obviously that's what has to happen, because I will not be opening presents alone with Kaleb. But what the heck? I feel like I pulled the short straw this year for holidays. Thank goodness I might as well be Martha freaking Stewart and will put on my happy face and make it a great day no matter what!

On a lighter note..Roland and I celebrated our 3rd wedding anniversary today. (Insert happy face here!) It was a great day. We sat around relaxing and at breakfast we talked about our wedding day and everything we did the night before and day of. It really was a great day. Last night we went to Chuckchansi Casino and had a yummy dinner and gambled for a bit. When we got back to town we went to World Sports Cafe and watched the end of the football game then caught a late movie. It was fun, but made for a tired little mommy. Thank goodness relaxing was the only thing on schedule today! Kaleb gets home in the morning and I cannot wait another second to see my little LoveBug! I have missed him so much!

Enjoy some Halloween pictures before you go!

Buggie enjoying some pre-trick-or-treating candy!


See why I have to brush those teeth so much?!


Cousins ready to go!


With Mama.


Cutey Cousins!


"Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things you are, and the things you never want to lose."